i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
