I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
