Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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