Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
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