I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize