We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
