so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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