So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
