end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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