would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
