I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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