Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
