everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Do vagina's smell?
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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