His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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