You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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