..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Randomize
