Already got asked if we're dating
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
how drunk are you?
Several
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize
