2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
You pole danced in your parka.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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