hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Randomize
