I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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