We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Your cock deserves a montage
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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