idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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