i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize
