@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
