so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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