Don't you send me to vm
I got chris browned last night
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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