Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
