so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
