wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
