yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
