Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Randomize
