private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
