my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I'm bleeding and have questions
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
