He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize