4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
