i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I believe in your delicious
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
