you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Randomize
