be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
the gays at disneyland are vicious
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
