Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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