we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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