so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I'm always down for nudity.
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