Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
