Cold hands, warm shart.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
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