hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize