can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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