i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
you didnt know i had herpes?
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
