I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
