I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
