WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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