He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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